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Nervous About Wrestling?

Here's a question from a concerned parent:

I have a question about my six year old son. He has two brothers age 11 and 9. They all are first year wrestlers. My son loves to wrestle in practice but when we go to matches he starts complaining that he doesn't feel good. I try to explain that it's nerves, but he cries terribly and once I tell him he doesn't have to wrestle he is fine. He has a fear which I think is the noise and the crowd. I guess it's just hard because he does really well and I know he could be winning and gaining more wrestling knowledge. I just don't know what to do? Any insight would be helpful.

Answer: Your son's reaction is not at all unusual. First of all, he is only 6 years old. Few 6 year olds are ready, emotionally or physically, for organized athletics of any kind especially one as demanding and as competitive as wrestling.

The fact that he cries or complains of not feeling well at matches is a typical indication that he is not emotionally ready to participate in this organized, structured event. Instead, he should be enjoying less competitive activities in less-structured, non-threatening situations. He is simply overwhelmed if he has to participate in  matches and you should certainly not push him into this  situation.

For now, you should forget about "winning and gaining wrestling knowledge" - after all, as I said before, he is only 6 years old. I believe very strongly that organized, competitive wrestling is NOT appropriate for a 6-year old.

This begs the question... Why is he, at age 6, enrolled in a highly competitive sport that requires considerable self-discipline, physical and emotional maturity when his older brothers, 9 and 11, are just now starting?

I would suggest that you wait at least a year or two before you push him into this sport as an active and fulltime participant. If he enjoys going to practice, let him go and watch and even "play at it" informally with other children his own age/size. But do it on age appropriate terms (i.e. by introducing some elementary drills or techniques) and not as a contest with a winner and a loser. There is plenty of time for that when he is older.

I hope you will understand and will follow my advice, for your 6-year old son's sake.

February, 2003